Why?
Hi Everyone,
This is going to be a difficult post for me as I want to dive deeper into my background, why I’ve started this journey, my challenges I’m facing, and where I’m at right now. (Perhaps some of you can relate)
I was Born in 1969 (Gen X) and raised in Connecticut. I would call our family a “ hard-working middle-class” family as my parents always had multiple jobs to put food on the table and to provide for our family. I always had a strong belief in God but never really took action on it through church until I was much older.
Growing up, I recall always being outside. Either, hiking miles to the nearest river to swim, or biking all over town to play with my friends, to riding my motocross motorcycle in the woods behind our house. Regardless of where I was outside, my queue to come home was the sun starting to set and seeing the street lights on our street beginning to turn on.
I was not the most motivated kid growing up and where I always had the “potential”, doing enough “just to get by”. I was lucky that I made it into College, which was Central Connecticut State University, and after 4 and a half years, finally graduated in 1992 with a BS in Computer Science.
After college, I always had one or more jobs, got married, had two amazing kids but always struggled financially, and living paycheck to paycheck.
I didn’t understand how money or credit worked, was lured into the trap of borrowing money at high-interest rates, and quickly sank into the trap of credit card debt. I wound up paying so much of my monthly income just to make the minimum payments that I felt like I was slowly drowning.
As the stresses of life increased (lack of money, lack of time to make more money, kids growing up) so did the strain on our marriage. We tried years of counseling but in the end, we were divorced. It was very difficult not only for us but for our kids as well. It was (and still can be) a very difficult time for our whole family.
Then, when I didn’t think my stress could go any higher, a few major life events happened. First, I lost my mother at a relatively young age due to heart issues. A few months after, my Dad decided to move down to Florida to be closer to my brother, then a few months later I lost my consulting job and was unemployed for 6 months. I would up having to cash in, the retirement savings I had leftover (From the divorce) just to try and survive.
bam……It was like being stuck in a pit, with no light, no way out, no idea what to do or how I was going to make it through the next day. The fear and depression were a real, and tangible beast living with me every day.
This was a very dark time for me, and when I also started to learn that credit card and loan companies are NOT anyone’s friend. Just when you need help the most, they turn into sharks, trying to nibble off any piece of you they can get. I was now over my head and the sharks were constantly nipping at my heels.
My emotional state was a mess. The fear of not being able to pay child-support and losing the joint custody of my kids, feeling of failure, fear of not being able to buy food or gas for my car. Being depressed, feeling abandoned, on my own, and not wanting to get out of bed. All this happening in the cold and dark winter time in Connecticut, which can already be a difficult time for most people.
Then, just when I was giving up hope, some amazing things happened to me. First I met, who is now, my amazing wife. Second, I found a wonderful, Christian-based Church, and third I found the means to start my financial transformation and get out of the shark-infested waters.
My Financial transformation all started with a talk with one of the church pastors, who I informed of my financial issues and who then guided me to the first step of growing wealth; “get out of debt”
Through that process, I learned how to set up a realistic budget, learned how to stop spending my money on unwanted items, and learned how to start saving money. I was finally getting my bills in order and paying down the credit debt. I now had a spear to poke at the sharks and they were receding.
At the same time, my relationship with God grew as did my spirituality. I joined my church’s worship team as one of the drummers and still blessed to be able to do this today. (we’re all online now so I’ll share a link in a future post)
My confidence was also growing and the fear was losing its grip on me as I could once again take care of my family and see the light!
(For anyone that’s interested in this first step, how to get out of debt, I will dedicate part of this series just to that topic.
During this time I also found an amazing job (and still there today) and my day-to-day finances are now ok, but looking towards retirement, I’m starting to feel that same fear creep back into the pit of my stomach.
So here I am, 51 (almost 52), finally have my finances in order, but the next challenge is how do I retire happy, and still be able to take care of my family and loved ones? The pain of not having enough money is slowly creeping back into my life but this time, I’m proactively doing something about it!
I’ve started an online company and learning to grow my business! It’s an amazing adventure but also very confusing.
This blog will continue to discuss what I’ve been doing over the last few months since I started, but also discuss the challenges and successes that I have.
I pray and hope this blog finds those that it can be of service to, as well as my Facebook and TikTok pages below.
I feel there is a lot of “unrealistic” messages out there, everyone trying to “get rich quick” and that is NOT the way it goes.
Yes, a few people can get lucky, but for most of us, it’s hard work and perseverance. It’s putting ourselves out there and trying something new, scary, and different.
Even with the true offers that are out there, it can be very confusing, so I’m working on an offer to not only guide fellow like-minded people on the right path but also to help them with each step!
This blog will be my real journey, in hopes I can help others as I go. Come join the adventure!
Peace and God Bless
Scott
